As a mother, when any of my children are in jeopardy, instinctively I want to gather them near me, wrap them up and protect them. This instinct is seen in the animal kingdom time and time again and we human animals are no different. I have been trying to encourage Jay to move to Vancouver, citing the ocean air is better, there's more nature etc.; all which are conducive to a healthier lifestyle but ultimately the reason is because I want him nearer to me and to Karley. Today, I found myself getting extremely frustrated because I felt that he and Rachel were resisting my suggestions. I had to go deep inside myself to accept the fact that even though Jay is my child, he is a 27-year-old man with a full and happy life in Markham. Rachel was born and raised in this area and her family and friends are here and Jay has become a big part of that. Rachel is his family now and even though he is my child and he has two siblings, we all have separate lives with "new" families and that is how it should be.

Jay is very well respected and loved by his many friends and colleagues. Richard and Sue Robbins, his employers are warm, wonderful and generous people and have been very kind and supportive through Jay's ordeal. He has found a good naturopath here, an acupuncturist and practitioner of Chinese medicine here and Dr. Wright, his surgeon is here. Other than the air pollution, the healthcare he has found is second to none. He is part of a community here and uprooting himself to "find" a healthier place to live could just as easily have an adverse effect on his overall well-being.

It is difficult for me to "let go" of the possibility of having Jay near me and I will continue to struggle with that for a while. As I have stated earlier, this whole process has been a huge education for me and Jay has essentially been my primary teacher. When I leave here next week, I will leave here more enlightened than when I arrived. I will always reflect on these days as some of the best in my life. No matter where Jay lives or where I live, we will always have a bond that only a mother and child can have that distance cannot weaken. And should he require my assistance again, I hope I am still able to go to him wherever he is.